Hey everybody! I'm here in North Carolina right now with my mom and stepdad--kinda an unscheduled "vacation" of sorts. My mother was in a serious car accident several days ago and of course I had to hot-foot it here to see for myself that she was all right! She's fine, generally speaking, but the car was totalled and it's truly a blessing that she was able to walk away from it under her own power. Anyway, I've just been thinking about some of the issues that we as women have with our hair...
What is the "thing" that we have about our hair? Why aren't we comfortable, for the most part, with what God gave us? If our hair is long, we want it short, if it's short we want it long, we want it flowing and straight and "just so"--why do we want something other than what we were naturally given? So far in my loc journey, have discovered a couple of things about myself as it relates to my hair: 1) I really do like my natural texture, 2) my natural texture isn't as hard to work with as I thought at one time, 3) my hair is beautiful just the way it is, and 4) I don't feel any less feminine with my hair short.
I really do like the texture of my hair--it's coily/wavy and soft to the touch. It's springy, curls easily and actually behaves quite well, sans relaxer. I'm getting some silver in with the dark brown/black strands now, and it's all good! The silver is beautiful. My natural texture isn't as hard to work with as I once thought--as long as I am working WITH my texture and not AGAINST it. If I listen to my hair, it will tell me what it likes and doesn't like; all I have to do is listen. It likes minimal manipulation--it likes locs! My hair loves olive oil and jojoba oil and it currently loves the smell of jasmine essential oil--the smell stays for a long time and each time I catch a whiff of it, it brings a smile to my spirit. My hair is soft and fragrant and my man loves the rough velvet texture in his hands. My hair is beautiful and I don't have to do anything other than keep it clean to keep it beautiful. It needs no relaxing or shine serum or frizz control serum or flat iron or curling iron to show its beauty. My hair has a subtle sheen that is given by nature and is as it should be. In time, with patience and care, it will grow to new lengths and perhaps even exceed the lengths that I had when I was relaxed. I feel no loss of femininity with my current short hair; why should I? My hair doesn't define me as a woman; it is merely a common idealistic symbol of my status as a woman. Were I to become bald, I would still be a woman because my DNA and my thoughts and my socialization and my internal/external physical and psychological makeup would mark me as such. I will not feel more feminine as my hair grows longer, neither will I feel less feminine with my currently shorter hairstyle.
What is is about our hair that gives us such anxiety, such anguish? I think that we as black women should find the answer(s) to this question within ourselves and then seek ways to become comfortable with what the Creator has given to us. As for me, I am now truly in love with what the Creator has given me and I embrace it fully, it's beauty and it's strength, it's sometimes quirkiness, it's loveliness and it's awesomeness and I give thanks to Him for making me thus.